1 Glove Me Daddy - A box of fifty lubricated condoms in randomized colors and flavors. If you want to get ecstatic, use a prophylactic!
2 Space Lube - A tube helpfully labeled Space Lube. The tube is as big as a full-grown man and weighs about 90 lbs.
3 Mild Painkiller - A small bottle that says NSAID pain reliever/fever reducer on the side. Contains about 20 pills.
4 Playing Cards - A deck of playing cards. It has a sticker like it's from a casino, but it's not any casino on Earth.
5 Plumbus - Well, it's either a sex toy or a shower aid. Or both. Probably both. At least it comes with an owner's manual.
6 Potato Chips - A bag of delicious greasy, salty potato chips. How can something so bad for you taste so good?
7 Fruit and Nut Basket - A large red straw basket filled with oranges, grapefruits, several varieties of apples, pecans, walnuts, and Brazil nuts. Unfortunately, a nutcracker is not included.
9 Bottled Water - A bottle of clear mountain spring water.
10 Instant Ramen - A packet of instant ramen. Just add hot water and stir in the flavor packet for a basic college staple.
11 Gelatin - Instant fruit-flavored gelatin mix. Just add hot water, stir, and set in the fridge. You can even use cookie cutters to make fun shapes*! *Cookie cutters not included.
12 Model Time Machine - A blue and white model spaceship with a six-pointed red insignia on the... balls. It looks like a cock and balls.
13 Wanna See a Trick? - A set of six ping pong balls. They look white under normal light, but if you turn the lights out they glow.
Congratulations!
Glove Me Daddy - A box of fifty lubricated condoms in randomized colors and flavors. If you want to get ecstatic, use a prophylactic!
2
Space Lube - A tube helpfully labeled Space Lube. The tube is as big as a full-grown man and weighs about 90 lbs.
3
Mild Painkiller - A small bottle that says NSAID pain reliever/fever reducer on the side. Contains about 20 pills.
4
Playing Cards - A deck of playing cards. It has a sticker like it's from a casino, but it's not any casino on Earth.
5
Plumbus - Well, it's either a sex toy or a shower aid. Or both. Probably both. At least it comes with an owner's manual.
6
Potato Chips - A bag of delicious greasy, salty potato chips. How can something so bad for you taste so good?
7
Fruit and Nut Basket - A large red straw basket filled with oranges, grapefruits, several varieties of apples, pecans, walnuts, and Brazil nuts. Unfortunately, a nutcracker is not included.
8
Church's Underwear - Put up the wolfjob, Barry
9
Bottled Water - A bottle of clear mountain spring water.
10
Instant Ramen - A packet of instant ramen. Just add hot water and stir in the flavor packet for a basic college staple.
11
Gelatin - Instant fruit-flavored gelatin mix. Just add hot water, stir, and set in the fridge. You can even use cookie cutters to make fun shapes*! *Cookie cutters not included.
12
Model Time Machine - A blue and white model spaceship with a six-pointed red insignia on the... balls. It looks like a cock and balls.
13
Wanna See a Trick? - A set of six ping pong balls. They look white under normal light, but if you turn the lights out they glow.