airlockedmods: (0)
airlockedmods ([personal profile] airlockedmods) wrote 2017-03-21 01:42 am (UTC)

Congratulations!

1
Vuvuzela - A long plastic instrument that creates a long, droning buzz. Perfect for drowning out people who love to toot their own horn.

2
Bubble Wrap - A roll of bubble wrap about two feet wide and two hundred feet long. Perfect for keeping cinnamon rolls safe from murder (just remember to leave room to breathe).

3
Chemise - A girl's chemise, made out of sturdy but thin fabric. The front of it is splattered in dried blood.

4
Gelatin - Instant fruit-flavored gelatin mix. Just add hot water, stir, and set in the fridge. You can even use cookie cutters to make fun shapes*! *Cookie cutters not included.

5
Mini Cheese Wheel - A tiny wheel of cheese in a bright red wrapper. The label has a picture of a smiling cow.

6
Christine Junior - A tiny red convertible. It's powered by pedals like a bicycle, with a steering wheel. For some reason it makes you think of old men in silly hats.

7
Whiskey - A bottle of whiskey. It tastes expensive.

8
Hand Sanitizer - A bottle of alcohol-based hand sanitizer. It kills 99.99% of germs.

9
Tea - A tin full of loose leaf tea leaves. The smell reminds you of home.

10
Walking Stick - A simple wooden walking stick. It has a tasteful corkscrew design.

11
Clown Painting - A painting of a clown. The work is so impeccable, it's almost lifelike.

12
Coffee - A half-pound bag of whole bean coffee. It's high-quality beans from a faraway land.

13
Christine Junior - A tiny red convertible. It's powered by pedals like a bicycle, with a steering wheel. For some reason it makes you think of old men in silly hats.

(Apparently the answer to "what happens when you put a beaten up Christine Junior in the dumbwaiter" is "you get TWO NEW CHRISTINE JUNIORS".)

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